Heidi Pratt's had babies on the brain as of late, and soon, the would-be mom will be swapping spots with another on-air personality who's ready for the miracle of birth. Yep, while Elisabeth Hasselbeck's out on maternity leave, the Hillzie will be one of several celebs taking a turn as guest-co-host on The View!

+ Think Heids will do a good job filling in for the show's resident right-winger? Take the poll and tell us whether this Hills gal can hold her own next to industry vet Barbara Walters, plus mark your calendars: Pratt will be joining the View crew on Thursday, Oct. 1!

• Since breaking up with Paris Hilton, Good Charlotte rocker Benji Madden has been romantically linked to Britney Spears (who denies it) and now ... Audrina Patridge?! Seriously, who is this guy's publicist and HOW SOON CAN WE HIRE HER? (Audrina's blog, via Usmagazine.com)

• Soothsayer Bret Michaels comes within one point of predicting the Super Bowl score(!). Geez, Is there anything that guy can't do? Y'know, besides find everlasting love with a bunch of bus skanks. (Newsroom)

• Bikini Girl has been booted from American Idol land! New judge, Kara DioGuardi, takes the high road by muttering "b-tch" under her breath as BG exits the stage. Brava! (Usmagazine.com)

• New Sex and the City sequel is finally official. Officially! (E! Online)

• Five-second View recap! "[Conservative co-host] Elisabeth Hasselbeck said that if Ashley Judd cares so much about wolves, she should talk about the "260,000 kids that are killed in abortions." (Jezebel)

• The View's Elisabeth Hasselbeck is expecting baby #3! No word yet on whether it'll be a boy or a girl, but know this: it WILL be born wearing a "Palin 2012" onesie. (Usmagazine.com)

• Anyone else think Miss Kentucky is looking a bit on the Sasquatchy/Joaquin Phoenix side? (Inquisitr via E!)

• Update! Alex McCord and Simon van Kempen (a.k.a. the annoying Brooklyn couple who ruined Girls' Night In on Real Housewives: NY) is STILL bragging about their prodigious unremarkable son, Francois. (TV Watch)

• American Idol apologizes for telling America that a kindly Southern man threatened to kill Paula Abdul. (Perez Hilton)

• On last night's Top Chef, Carla fretes, Fabio admits he'd "a-likka to knocka somebody offa" and Stefan finds out he's not as amazing as everybody he thinks he is. (Baltimore Sun Blog)

• Playboy founder Hugh Hefner sees Britney Spears' wholesome family Christmas card, and raises her two topless twins. Because nothing says "Merry Christmukkah" quite like two naked chicks posing with an octogenarian porn peddler. 'Tis the season! (HuffPo)

• Meanwhile, Hef's ex, Holly Madison, says she plans to propose to her new illusionist boyfriend, Criss Angel. Levitation ... it gets the ladies every time! Well, that and not being old enough to need a catheter. (Usmagazine.com)

• Courteney Cox says she comes from a broken home and she and hubby David Arquette ain't gettin' no dee-vorce. Got that? (Usmagazine.com)

• Funnylady Amy Poehler put on her thinking cap and came up with these homemade webisodes of Smart Girls At The Party, a web-only series that reminds us of The View, only with prepubescent girls instead of Elisabeth Hasselbeck. (E! Online)

• NBC is reportedly having trouble unloading those obscenely-priced Super Bowl ads this year. On the plus side, this means we might actually go five minutes without seeing that annoying dude from the FreeCreditReport.com commercials. Score! (Yahoo! News, via TV Squad)

• Jamie-Lynn Sigler and Jeremy "Turtle" Ferrara's real life maybe-coupledom is an inspiration to chubby freeloaders everywhere. (Scandalist)

• Alec Baldwin says making out with Jennifer Aniston (who recently guest-starred on 30 Rock) was "painful." (Usmagazine.com)

• Rosie O'Donnell wants you to know that the ladies from The View get along about as well off-camera as they do on the show. (LA Times)

• Dancing with the Stars' Julianne Hough says she's quitting the show because it's hard to dance and sing at the same time. Also hard? Walking and chewing gum! (TV Watch)

• TLC unveils plans for its newest series: Toddlers in Tiaras, a pageant-themed show aimed at exploiting the exploitation of underage girls. Hey, sounds neat! In a disturbing JonBenet Ramsey meets the chubby girl from Little Miss Sunshine meets Lolita kinda way.

• Apparently, Sarah Palin asked Tina Fey if she needed a babysitter during SNL last weekend -- and offered up her daughter, Bristol, for the job! Sadly, Tina turned her down, most likely because (a) she already had a sitter lined up (b) that would've been weird, and (c) last Saturday just happened to be Bristol's birthday. (HuffPo)

• DWTS's Julianne Hough is taking a 2-week break from dancing to undergo an appendectomy. But then...it's back to ballroom! (MSNBC)

• Meanwhile, Cloris Leachman won't be Dancing anytime soon, but she already has her next gig lined up: a role in Brad Pitt's new movie! (OK!)

• The View denies rumors of an Elisabeth Hasselbeck/Joy Behar rift, despite strong on-air evidence to the contrary. (Usmagazine.com)

• Grey's Anatomy update: That hot/slightly insane army surgeon Cristina smooched in the season opener is returning to Seattle Grace. Welcome back, McSociopath! (E! Online)

• OMG, Nathan and Brooke (i.e. James Lafferty and Sophia Bush) from One Tree Hill are totally dating! Which is really, really exciting for the .005% of you who still watch the CW -- and know that Sophia was briefly (but memorably!) married to the show's other star, Chad Michael Murray. (E! Online)

• Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel might be broken up (at least, for now) but that's not stopping her from popping by her ex's late night show. (Usmagazine.com)

• Elisabeth Hasselbeck isn't enjoying The View of Joy Behar these days. Word has it, she and the "comedienne" are taking a cue from angry 7th grade girls everywhere and giving each other the silent treatment. Which, perhaps, explains why Hasselback's suddenly unhappy with her role as the show's token conservative. (Fox News)

• You know that old saying ("One man's trash is another man's treasure")? Yeah, we always thought that was neat. Oh, and in completely unrelated news, Jessica Simpson's latest straight-to-DVD movie here in the States is apparently #1 at the box office in Russia. (Scandalist)

• Michelle Obama tells Jay Leno she's not a fashionista -- like, oh, we don't know, Sarah "Clothes Horse" Palin. (Jezebel)

• According to Katie Couric, Tom Cruise is totes jealous of Today show host Matt Lauer. Why? Because "[Cruise] wants to be the only heterosexual man in the room who everyone thinks is gay." Zing! (CNN)

• Jessica Szohr (a.k.a. Vanessa from Gossip Girl) admits that her character is kinda lame. Sadly, she refuses to discuss the awkward sexual tension between Vanny and Dan Humphrey's dad. (MTV News)

• The View's Elisabeth Hasselbeck thinks the media's putting way too much attention on Sarah Palin's designer duds. Oh, and BTW, Palin is totally "not a fashionista." (Obvs, she's a pitbull!) Which explains why "she called Jimmy Choos Johnny Choos" by mistake. D'oh! (Usmagazine.com)

• Project Runway's Tim Gunn joins Speidi, other gay rights activists in standing up for same-sex marriage. (E! Online)

• Recently ousted reality something-or-other Kim Kardashian is betting on Brooke Burke to win this year's Dancing with the Stars. (TV Watch)

• How I Met Your Mother star Alyson Hannigan is about to be a mommy! She and her husband, Alexis Denisof, are expecting their first beh beh. Wait, is anyone else thinking spinoff? (Usmagazine.com)

• Bill O'Reilly will not go quietly into the night. The tv pundit just signed on for four more years of Fox News. (The Hollywood Reporter)

• Meanwhile, Bill also found time to swing by The View, just in time to see his fellow right-winger Elisabeth Hasselbeck get slammed by Barbara Walters for showing up to work in a John McCain t-shirt. (Jezebel)

• Lance Bass thinks the Dancing With The Stars judges were way harsh in their critique of his (amahzing!) partner, Lacey Schwimmer. Gawd, it's like they've never seen an episode of So You Think You Can Dance, or something! (TV Watch)

•: Tina Fey to get the Annie Leibovitz/Vanity Fair treatment once again. We're thinking she should go for the patented Miley Cy-in-a-bed-sheet look this time. (Radar)

• In addition to perfecting her Sarah Palin impression, Tina Fey's been busy recruiting A-listers for her hit show, 30 Rock. First Jennifer Aniston, then Oprah, now Salma Hayek? Who's next, the pope? (Gossip Girls)

• Despite having nothing but the utmost respect for Fox News, Elisabeth Hasselbeck denies she's leaving The View. (Usmagazine.com)

• Project Runway sneak peek! Here's a preview of Jerell, Kenley, Korto and Leanne's Bryant Park collections, for those of you with no patience -- and no Getty images subscription. (E! Online)

• Time magazine's picks for the top ten most unnecessary tv spinoffs. And yes, Joey from Friends' short-lived solo project made the cut. (Time via TV Squad)

• Fox 5 news anchor John Roland on why he decided to go commercial. (NY Daily News)

• Jimmy Smits stabbed a stuntman on the set of Dexter when he grabbed a real knife instead of the plastic prop. (Perez Hilton)