• Danger, Will Robinson, danger! The new 90210 is rapidly losing viewers! Perhaps it's time to bust open those Emergency Sideburns Kits? Or, better yet, bring Dylan/Brandon in as reinforcements? (Perez Hilton)

• Meanwhile, turns out Gossip Girl's Blake Lively is as much of a clothes-horse as Serena van der Woodsen! (Gossip Girls)

• Pineapple Express star James Franco ogled by uncouth Columbia freshmen girls. (NY Post)

• Tonight's ANTM forces the girls to look "fierce" while wearing ridiculous clothes and doing something inherently unattractive! (TV Watch)

• Meanwhile, Big Brother update: Another silly blonde gal is forcibly evicted! This time, by the evil Memphis. (PopWatch)

• Watch out, Lauren! Hills hunk Brody Jenner is reportedly dating Playboy's 2008 Playmate of the year, Jayde Nicole. (E! Online)

• Elisabeth Hasselbeck continues to live up to her role as The View's token right-winger. (Perez Hilton)

• Don't miss the series premiere of Hole in the Wall, the crazy American game show (based on the crazy Japanese game show) about Human Tetris. Hey, don't knock it till you've tried it. (NYDN)

• Meanwhile, celeb stylist Rachel Zoe's new Bravo show will have you skipping meals and buying oversized designer sunglasses in no time. (TV Watch)

• And strangely, Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles continues to not suck this season. (PopWatch)

• Jennifer Lopez to judge the season finale of Project Runway. (Usmagazine.com)

• Is 90210 ushering in a new spinoff era? Rumor has it Leisha Hailey is starring in a new L Word offshoot! (Popwatch)

• Meanwhile, is The Wonder Years getting a new 80's-centric remake of its own?? (Perez Hilton)

• And is Brandon Walsh the next Teen Wolf? (Scandalist)

• Is Kim Kardashian the next Heidi Montag? (PopEater)

• Will Top Model judge Nigel Barker be a top dad? (Usmagazine.com)

• Does Jerry Seinfeld's Microsoft spot need its own laugh track? (E! Online)

• And will Adriana Lima be helping to beautify Ugly Betty? (People)

• Audrina "Ceiling Eyes" Patridge took time out of her busy sched to drop by The View this morning. (Audrina's blog)

• Check out exclusive footage of Jennifer Aniston's 30 Rock guest spot! (Usmagazine.com)

• ABDC's Mario Lopez lands the best magazine cover of all time! (Best Week Ever)

• Paula Abdul and the newest American Idol judge are totes BFF! Or else, you know, they're faking. (NY Post)

• Chef Gordon Ramsay confuses reality show with boring 2-hour self-promotional stunt. (NY Daily News)

• The new 90210 reportedly puts the "pit" in Peach Pit. (Entertainment Weekly)

• Especially in the video games department! (Kotaku)

• Fortunately for Brenda, that didn't actually stop people from watching. (Perez Hilton)

• Meanwhile, The Hills' Audrina Patridge reveals she's lined up a guest spot on MADtv! (Audrina's blog)

• Catch up on the best 30 Rock episodes ever! Pre-Jennifer Aniston, of course. (Popwatch)

• David Letterman will not go quietly into the (late) night. (E! Online)

• A new season of ANTM starts tonight! And yes, Tyra, we still refuse to say "cycle." (NYDN)

• Rumor alert! (Unconfirmed) word has it that Diddy's supposed favoritism of Dawn Richards is tearing Danity Kane apart! (NYDN)

• Meanwhile, Diddy questions McCain's choice of running mate, and wonders aloud about the black/crackhead population of Alaska. (Scandalist)

• Jennifer Aniston to play a stalker on 30 Rock. (Usmagazine.com)

• Meanwhile, Harry Potter's Daniel Radcliffe kinda sorta wants to play a drag queen. (Just Jared)

• Hills' Jason Wahler still facing legal woes. (E! Online)

• Disaster Movie officially comes in at a 0...on a scale from 1-100. (Best Week Ever)

• Danity Kane join their MTV brothers and sisters in RSVPing "yes" for next weekend's VMAs awards bash. (Buzzworthy)

• Rumor debunked! Spencer shoots down reports that he and Heidi are planning to open a bar in NYC. (Usmagazine.com)

• But don't look to PopEater for the latest Speidi update. The site may be on the verge of abolishing all Spencer/Heidi-related news coverage. The horror! (Best Week Ever)

• Meanwhile, Blake Lively turns forgetting-to-wear-pants into a fashion statement. (Scandalist)

• And loose-lipped Gossip Girl producers spill the beans about Blair's new man and Jenny's evil plans for world domination. (People)

+ The unstoppable Michael Phelps has already parlayed his 8 Olympic gold medals into a Sports Illustrated cover, a hosting op on SNL and a cameo on Entourage. Next stop? Mars. (E! Online)

+ Sad news, Dylan McKay fans. Neither Luke Perry nor his famous sideburns will be appearing on the 90210 spinoff. (ICYDK)

+ Gossip Girl continues to embody the right combination of meanspiritedness and gratuitous sex scenes. (Entertainment Weekly)

+ Meanwhile, The O.C. and Buffy the Vampire Slayer invade TheWB.com. OMFG! (PopWatch)

+ This week, Project Runway's designers were tasked with turning car parts into evening wear! Discuss. (People)

• Next time you're having a beer pong tourney, be sure to invite Heidi Montag along. The Hills chick played a few rounds of Beirut with Jamie-Lynn Sigler at a recent Olympic-themed kegger, though eyewitnesses claim Jamie Lynn was totes carrying the team. (Just Jared)

• Meanwhile, got ten minutes? Then grab your barbells and check out Heidi's new "Overdosin'" vid. (Radar)

• Or watch her destroy her beloved Spencer Pratt in a heated game of "Facebreaker." (Multiplayer)

• Kathy Griffin to present at this year's Emmy's? What would Jesus think?? (E! Online)

• Meet ANTM's first ever transsexual contestant! (Perez Hilton)

• Jordin Sparks says she "[had] a crush on Simon before the show." Of course, that was also before they met. (Buzzworthy)

• Carmen Electra really, really enjoyed wrestling Kim Kardashian. (Contact Music)

• Paula Abdul couldn't be more excited about American Idol's newbie judge, Kara DioGuardi! Oh, and did she mention she also (supposedly) launched DioGuardi's career? (E! Online)

• But who is this mysterious Kara DioGuardi person? And how long will it take her to find the comfortable middle ground between Simon the Grouch and Paula the Kiss-Ass? (NYDN)

• And what does Conan O'Brien have to say about all these Idol-related changes? (Entertainment Weekly)

• Meanwhile, Kim Kardashian is already gearing up for her big DWTS debut. (People)

• Also: There's still no word on what caused Kelly Osbourne's shiner. (TMZ)