Dear Audrina,
First off, congrats on (finally!) breaking it off with Justin Bobby! It took a couple of tries, but now you're finally free to meet someone who really understands you. Someone who uses polysyllabic words! Someone who loves bobbing his head at the weird shows and doesn't run away screaming at the the word "commitment".
Anyhow, you're single and ready to mingle. (Just like Beyonce would've wanted.) And while we fully support that, we're thinking you might've made a slight mistake by going on your first official post-Justin date with ... Justin's best friend in the whole entire world.
We know, we know, you told Derek you didn't want to talk about you-know-who (and his you-know-what'ercyle) but the fact is, you only KNOW each other because of JB. Which means, even if you and Derek DO hit it off, you'll constantly be reminded of his belching, shirtless overalls-wearing, Kristin Cavallari-dating BFF.
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Dear Mr. Bentley,
Let me start out by saying that I think you're a very knowledgeable guy. You've got that whole debonair, sophisticated thing down. In fact, you're kinda like a modern-day Emily Post! (Assuming the 19th century Miss Manners was reincarnated as a highly attractive/charismatic black man).
Hell, if I were ever a contestant on some crazy, all-etiquette version of Who Wants to Be A Millionaire?, you know you'd be my landline. And the next time my buddies and I get into a heated debate over the correct number of prongs on a salad fork (or the do's and don'ts of curtsying) I'd happily defer to your judgment -- that is, assuming old Grandma Van der Woodsen was unavailable.
And while I readily acknowledge your infinite wisdom of all things preppy, I can't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, you made a mistake by sending T-Jones home on this week's From G's to Gents.
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Dear Whitney,
It's been all over the news that you're traipsing around town, taking meetings with Diane von Furstenberg (a.k.a. queen of the slimming wrap-dress!) and contemplating a move to NYC. And we have one thing to say to you: DON'T LEAVE US, WHITNEY!
Sure, working for Kelly Cutrone can be a little taxing at times (okay, so she practically ripped that Jessica chick a new one) but she totes seems to like you for now! Plus, we've only just started to get used to the idea of you going bicoastal -- if you leave sunny California in favor of dirty, smelly, New York, who's going to be there the next time GMA needs a rapidly falling model, or Jason gets engaged (again) right in front of L.C.?!
Anyways, we're not in any state right now to make sense of all the vague spinoff rumors (deja vu, anyone?) and unsubstantiated gossip floating around. We just wanted to let you know that we like our Whitney right where we can see her: on The Hills, every Monday night at 10pm.
Let's try and keep it that way, shall we?
Much love!
Show Girl
P.S. So you know, we heard the last girl who tried to skip out on Kelly Cutrone ended up with a horse head at the foot of her mattress. Just sayin'...
