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Girls Next Door star Holly Madison gives us icky mental pictures (and ickier real-life pictures) of her swapping spit with her new Albino boyfriend, Criss Angel. (Scandalist)

Steve Martin has just been announced as 30 Rock's latest desperate ploy for ratings celeb guest star. Hooray! (E! Online)

Sarah Palin pardons one lucky Wasilla turkey while the bird's not-so-lucky brethren meet an untimely death at the slaughterhouse. Also, peep that (newly purchased?) Burberry scarf! (BuzzFeed)

Kathie Lee Gifford is the best/worst Today Show host ever! (Defamer)

Ashley Dupre's belated heart-to-heart with Diane Sawyer makes us nostalgic for the days when "Client 9" jokes were all the rage. (Gawker)