First, she bared her boobies in Playboy. Then, she passed on becoming the next Tila Tequila. And now, one-time Danity Kaner Aubrey O'Day's got her biggest news yet: she's moving to Vegas (baby, Vegas!) to become the real-life vershe of Nomi Malone!*

Yep, as MTV News confirmed, Aubrey will officially take over as mistress of ceremonies for the popular Vegas stage show "Peepshow" (which co-stars fellow Playmate-turned-thespian Holly Madison). And she won't be traveling alone. Not only will Aubs (undoubtedly) come with her spray-painted pooch in tow, but she'll be bringing along a camera crew to document her every move, note and jiggle.

And judging by the show's description -- the choreography's said to resemble a "high-level production" strip tease -- we're thinking she just might have a(nother) hit on her hands.

*Elizabeth Berkley's character in Showgirls (a.k.a. the best/worst movie ever).

• Playboy founder Hugh Hefner sees Britney Spears' wholesome family Christmas card, and raises her two topless twins. Because nothing says "Merry Christmukkah" quite like two naked chicks posing with an octogenarian porn peddler. 'Tis the season! (HuffPo)

• Meanwhile, Hef's ex, Holly Madison, says she plans to propose to her new illusionist boyfriend, Criss Angel. Levitation ... it gets the ladies every time! Well, that and not being old enough to need a catheter. (Usmagazine.com)

• Courteney Cox says she comes from a broken home and she and hubby David Arquette ain't gettin' no dee-vorce. Got that? (Usmagazine.com)

• Funnylady Amy Poehler put on her thinking cap and came up with these homemade webisodes of Smart Girls At The Party, a web-only series that reminds us of The View, only with prepubescent girls instead of Elisabeth Hasselbeck. (E! Online)

• NBC is reportedly having trouble unloading those obscenely-priced Super Bowl ads this year. On the plus side, this means we might actually go five minutes without seeing that annoying dude from the FreeCreditReport.com commercials. Score! (Yahoo! News, via TV Squad)

• Girls Next Door star Holly Madison gives us icky mental pictures (and ickier real-life pictures) of her swapping spit with her new Albino boyfriend, Criss Angel. (Scandalist)

• Steve Martin has just been announced as 30 Rock's latest desperate ploy for ratings celeb guest star. Hooray! (E! Online)

• Sarah Palin pardons one lucky Wasilla turkey while the bird's not-so-lucky brethren meet an untimely death at the slaughterhouse. Also, peep that (newly purchased?) Burberry scarf! (BuzzFeed)

• Kathie Lee Gifford is the best/worst Today Show host ever! (Defamer)

• Ashley Dupre's belated heart-to-heart with Diane Sawyer makes us nostalgic for the days when "Client 9" jokes were all the rage. (Gawker)

• Apparently, big stars don't always translate into big ratings (**except when your name is Oprah). Jennifer Aniston's episode of 30 Rock was the sitcom's lowest rated show this season. (E! Online)

• Rosie O'Donnell says she'd love to share a brewsky with Sarah Palin! But that doesn't mean O'Donnell wanted Palin anywhere near the Oval Office. "If [John] McCain won," says the former View cohost, "I would be in the depression unit of the ICU." (Usmagazine.com)

• MADE coach-turned-Bachelorette ex Jesse Csincsak says he and DeAnna Pappas are still friends despite the whole not-getting-married thing. But for now, he's taking things "one day at a time." (OK!)

• Holly Madison on stepping on her sugar daddy/employer Hugh Hefner with creepy magician/boyfriend Criss Angel: "I thought I'd be fired!" (Scandalist)

• Rumor has it Eliot Spitzer's callgirl, Ashley Dupre, may have had an on-camera heart-to-heart with Diane Sawyer. Hope she wasn't charging ABC by the hour! (Gawker)

• You can't blame Isaiah Washington (f.k.a. Dr. Burke) for joining the OMG, Grey's Hates Gays!! bandwagon. 'Course, his critique of the show's decision to fire Dr. Hahn would carry more weight if he weren't a) previously fired for his own latent homophobia, and (b) simultaneously begging Shonda Rhimes for his old job. (Usmagazine.com)

• Jumpin' Joe Scarborough is so excited about Barack Obama's clean campaign he's dropping F-bombs on MSNBC. Take that, FCC mother-f***ers! (HuffPo)

• Holly Madison is hoping to be a bridesmaid at Kendra Wilkinson's nuptials. Meanwhile, we're just hoping Hugh Hefner isn't the one giving her away. Hey, he was her (sugar) daddy... (People)

• Knight Rider to fire three of its series regulars (Bruce Davison, Sydney Tamiia Poitier, and Yancey Arias) and replace them with an onslaught of Hail, Mary celeb cameos. (Yahoo! News)

• NBC gives new "Life" to that "quirky detective show" that's nobody's ever seen. (TV Squad)

• Apparently, Kim Cattrall's SATC sequel talk was all a bit premature. "I'm thrilled to know Kim is excited, but all the deals are not yet done," sez series star Sarah Jessica Parker. Hmm, guess Samantha just got Carrie-d away? (Access Hollywood)

• SNL's Kenan Thompson doesn't think Tina Fey will be reprising her role as Sarah Palin. At least, not until, oh, 2012... (OMG! Yahoo!)

• Mr. Man has a name! Sam Perry, best known as The Guy Who Oprah Snotted All Over During Obama's Acceptance Speech, swung by Oprah's show the other day to send her a dry-cleaning bill tell her he had no hard feelings. (Usmagazine.com)

• Meanwhile, Oprah's bathroom shocker! The talk show host describes her first ev Port-A-Potty experience. (Dlisted)

• Holly Madison and Criss Angel continue to flaunt their newfound coupledom in front of our faces. (E! Online)

• Also?? Fellow Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson is engaged to a football star! Guess her pretending-to-be-Hef's-girlfriend contract was up, too. (Yahoo! News)

(Photo: ABC)

• Less than one week after Cally's new girlfriend compared their hot, between-the-sheets action to "getting glasses" comes word that Dr. Erica Hahn will be checking out of Seattle Grace hospital... permanently. Hmm, guess a good lesbian relationship is hard to find -- and even harder to keep -- on a ratings-challenged primetime show. (E! Online)

• And speaking of Grey's, is The Simpsons' Nelson Muntz the new Isaiah Washington?? (TMZ)

• Three reasons why comedienne Kathy Griffin sez she'd never do Dancing with the Stars: "Number one, I can’t even touch my toes. Number two, I don’t get along with others so I’d probably fire my partner. And number three, I am busy telling d— jokes and I cannot spend my time dancing. I have a lot of celebrities to offend and I need to stay focused." (People)

• It's official! Playboy bunny Holly Madison has dumped her creepy older man, Hugh Hefner for a creepy younger man: Criss Angel. Congrats? (E! Online)

• And finally, some unsolicited advice for Saturday Night Live's Kristen Wiig: Keep working on your Elisabeth Hasselbeck. (TV Squad)

• This just in: presidential hopeful John McCain to spend the last Saturday before next week's elections on SNL! With luck, his performance fall somewhere in the realm of Better Than The Last Time and Worse Than Sarah Palin. Only this time around, we're thinking he should lose the whole 'Haha, I'm really old' shtick. (People)

• Apparently, Sarah Silverman's appearance on her ex-boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel's late night talk show made for some pretty awkward moments! Yep, didn't see that one coming... (Usmagazine.com)

• What happens when the Girls Next Door move out of the neighborhood? We're not sure, but rumor has it Hef's girls Holly and Kendra are in search of new digs. (Usmagazine.com)

• The first rule of TV 101: If you're gonna make a show called Cougar Town, you must (we repeat, MUST) get Courteney Cox to star in it. Capiche? (The Insider)

• And speaking of cougars, word has it there's already a Melrose spinoff in the works! We're just hoping Amanda Woodward's still rocking three-inch roots -- and dressed like some sort of high-class, boardroom hooker. (Fox News)

• 30 Rock star Tracy Morgan's leaving the dimly-lit world of strip clubs behind...but that doesn't mean he can't still get his money's worth... (NY Daily News)

(Photo: NBC)

• Everyone knows Tina Fey does a mean Sarah Palin, but the SNL alum isn't looking to extend her run for, say, four more years. "If she wins, I'm done" Fey told TV Guide. "And by 'I'm done,' I mean I'm leaving Earth." (NY Daily News)

• Gossip Girls aren't just about designer clothes and killer highlights. They're also way into politics! (Well, maybe not Serena Van der Woodsen, but you KNOW prepubescent Dan Humphrey was out campaigning for Nader in 2000.) Meanwhile, Blake Lively and her real-life bf, Penn Badgley, are all about Obamarama. (E! Online)

• Hugh Hefner may have lost his main gal, Holly, but he's still living it up with the ladies! Oh, to be an octogenerian pornographer... (Usmagazine.com)

• This just in: Dancing with the Stars judges forget how to add, inadvertently award frivolous old lady Cloris Leachman an 8. (TV Squad)

• Meanwhile, Lance and Lacey soar (obvs!) while Rocco DiSpirito proves that he's (still) about as graceful as an elephant on roller skates. (TV Watch)

(Photo: ABC)

• You know how Misty May-Treanor had to leave Dancing with the Stars after destroying her ankle? Well, good news! Already-eliminated DWTS contestant Kim Kardashian has graciously offered to take her place on the show! Awww, that should TOTALLY help ease the pain of May's potentially career-ending injury. (Scandalist)

• Hmm, guess Khloe Kardashian's sis wasn't all that "relieved" to be done with Dancing after all... (TV Watch)

• On tonight's Grey's Anatomy, McDreamy and Meredith's cohabitation talk leads to a disaster of biblical proportions. Sigh. If only there were some sort of sign... (E! Online)

• Okay, fine, Victoria Beckham isn't exactly a reality tv star (unless you count that thankfully short-lived NBC miniseries.) But we'd be remiss if we didn't tell you that her can't-live-without beauty secret is....a skin cream "derived from nightingale poo." (Daily Mail - UK)

• OMG, Holly Madison and Hugh Hefner are officially no longer sleeping together! Well, assuming they ever really were. (Usmagazine.com)

• Get ready for the premiere of Bravo's The Real Housewives of Atlanta tonight. Here's to hoping one of the leading ladies is a pretentious underwear-model-turned-Duchess! (LA Times)