• Girls Next Door star Holly Madison gives us icky mental pictures (and ickier real-life pictures) of her swapping spit with her new Albino boyfriend, Criss Angel. (Scandalist)

• Steve Martin has just been announced as 30 Rock's latest desperate ploy for ratings celeb guest star. Hooray! (E! Online)

• Sarah Palin pardons one lucky Wasilla turkey while the bird's not-so-lucky brethren meet an untimely death at the slaughterhouse. Also, peep that (newly purchased?) Burberry scarf! (BuzzFeed)

• Kathie Lee Gifford is the best/worst Today Show host ever! (Defamer)

• Ashley Dupre's belated heart-to-heart with Diane Sawyer makes us nostalgic for the days when "Client 9" jokes were all the rage. (Gawker)

• Eliot Spitzer's personal escort, Ashley Dupre, wants to formally apologize to the former NYC governor's wife, Silda. Sadly, we're not sure Hallmark makes a "Sorry a shtooped your hubby" card. At least, not yet! (NY Post)

• Semi-famous funnylady Kathy Griffin confirms that there's another season of D-List in the works. Bring it, KG! (Usmagazine.com)

• Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman are either back together -- or else they're the kinda best friendsies who hug and kiss a lot. (E! Online)

• DWTS' Julianne Hough doesn't care what the judges/fans think about her just-eliminated-partner Cody Linley: "He's a winner to me," she says. (We think she means it in the metaphorical sense.) (OMG Yahoo!)

• Anyone else think Hottie McHotterson Megan Fox can do better than David Silver from 90210? (Scandalist)

• Apparently, big stars don't always translate into big ratings (**except when your name is Oprah). Jennifer Aniston's episode of 30 Rock was the sitcom's lowest rated show this season. (E! Online)

• Rosie O'Donnell says she'd love to share a brewsky with Sarah Palin! But that doesn't mean O'Donnell wanted Palin anywhere near the Oval Office. "If [John] McCain won," says the former View cohost, "I would be in the depression unit of the ICU." (Usmagazine.com)

• MADE coach-turned-Bachelorette ex Jesse Csincsak says he and DeAnna Pappas are still friends despite the whole not-getting-married thing. But for now, he's taking things "one day at a time." (OK!)

• Holly Madison on stepping on her sugar daddy/employer Hugh Hefner with creepy magician/boyfriend Criss Angel: "I thought I'd be fired!" (Scandalist)

• Rumor has it Eliot Spitzer's callgirl, Ashley Dupre, may have had an on-camera heart-to-heart with Diane Sawyer. Hope she wasn't charging ABC by the hour! (Gawker)