Last week, we all witnessed the sudden exile of housemate Angelina. Apparently, she never read the book, ‘An Idiot’s Guide to Calling into Work Sick.’ If she had, then she’d have known that the proper technique for faking a cough/cold requires a popsickle stick, cheap cigar and a raw onion.
Her sudden departure left us with many unanswered questions. The biggest one being, “What the hell was in those garbage bags?”
In my experience, people that carry around large garbage bags fall into 3 categories: Shady Drifter, Sanitation Worker and Hurricane Survivor. Since there hasn’t been a hurricane in the tri-state area for quite some time, I’m wondering which of the other two categories she might fall into.
I’m not sure if they’re going to fill her vacancy with another person, but that hasn’t stopped me from making a wish list of possible replacements. My list includes:
Robert Pattison- because lets face it, the boy could use some Jersey sun.
Tiger Woods- because he has plenty of free time on his hands now.
Kim Kardashian- because I’d like to see her in a hot tub with Snooki.
Octoman- because I think her litter would probably double by the end of the season.
Pauly Shore- because I’m nostalgic, and he kind of looks like a less buffed version of ‘The Situation’.
Jon Gosselin- because I think there’s a good chance Ronnie might deck him.
Betty White- because I think she’s the only woman on the planet that could tame Pauly D.
Now it’s your turn. If you had your pick, who would you want to move into the Shore house and why?
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