The future Mr. and Mrs. Tell!
Modern day engagements are easy: Boy meets girl, boy buys girl a monster diamond ring and girl excitedly breaks the news via Instagram with a Valencia-filtered snapshot of the rock. Modern day wedding planning, however? Not so much. Turns out, there are actually a zillion super boring steps between “Will you marry me?” and actually saying “I do.”
Though our favorite bride-to-be, Lauren Conrad, already nailed the most crucial part of marriage — actually getting engaged! — it’s an uphill battle of chiffon, florists and table charts from here on out. Sure, LC’s been training under Martha Stewart for months, which will only help her attack the Super Bowl of event planning head on, but even Tom Brady needs backup on the field, and we want to be there for not just Lauren as she plans her perfect “Hills” wedding, but for every bride-to-be out there. So, we’ve come up with 10 tips that’ll get you from affianced to happily hitched without breaking a sweat or murdering your maid of honor. Check ‘em out:
1. Be kind to your bridesmaids. Bridezillas may seem hilarious on TV, but in real life, screaming “IT’S MY DAY!” whenever things don’t go according to plan is a great way to end up holding your own train. Instead, be polite but direct about what you want, buy your girls prezzies as a preemptive thanks and don’t stick them in a fugly, shapeless frock. You think they’re gonna want to pose for 500 photos wearing hot pink ruffles and poufy sleeves?
2. Make a date with Emily Post. There’s a reason people still think of the 19th century auteur as the godmother of etiquette: She literally wrote the book on it. Girl may not have seen a single episode of “The Hills,” but she’s definitely your go-to source for all major wedding do’s and don’ts, like when to send out save-the-dates. Keep EmPo’s code of conduct handy and you’re guaranteed to win over even the fussiest of guests (i.e. your future mother-in-law).
3. Choose your Maid of Honor wisely. After all, this is the girl who has to pretend to be amazed while you try on 50 identical white dresses, plan a killer shower and bachelorette and listen to you agonize over the most trivial of details (ROUND OR SQUARE CENTERPIECES?!?), all while trying to juggle her own life. You can’t tap just anyone for this glamorous and unpaid position, which is why we’d like to officially nominate Lo Bosworth for the job. She’s smart, funny and looks great in formal wear. Plus, you know that’s gonna be one helluva speech.
4. Don’t be afraid to delegate. Wedding planners may be shrill, high-pitched and annoying, but they’re also hyper efficient when it comes to Making Really Boring Decisions Fast. Stay in the loop on the stuff that actually matters, like the venue and food, and let them handle all the minor details you couldn’t care less about.
5. Invest in waterproof mascara. When your dad is telling a room full of loved ones that his little girl is all grown up, you’ll never underestimate its importance again.
6. It’s OK to bunk tradition. Don’t feel like subjecting all your single lady friends to the bouquet toss? Nix it! Grandma Post may frown upon breaking from convention, but she’s also about 140 years behind the times. If you want to ditch the garter, book a Taylor Swift cover band or put your pups in the bridal party, knock yourself out! Your wedding, your rules. Don’t worry, Emily Post is waaay too ladylike to hold a grudge. (Also, she’s dead.)
7. Photobooths are a must. The silly props, random make-out sessions and awkward group pairings? You’ll totally thank us later.
8. FYI: Everyone will have an opinion. But before you get too overwhelmed, remember that you have something they don’t: final say on all major decisions. The next time someone tries to weigh in on your color scheme or song selection, just smile brightly and say “Thanks, I’ll definitely consider that!” then stick to the original plan because IT’S YOUR WEDDING!
9. It’s normal to want to strangle your future husby. Planning a wedding may sound romantic, but in reality, you won’t be snuggling on the couch with your betrothed so much as getting into annoying arguments about the guest list. Don’t forget that all great marriages are built on compromise! If you’re dead set on picking that cheesy Mariah Carey song for your first dance, you may have to let him invite his creepy co-worker who hits on everyone. Just make sure you seat your gal pals on the other side of the room.
10. It ain’t gonna be perfect. No matter how carefully you plan, it’s inevitable that you’ll have a few minor hiccups (like raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiin!) on your wedding day. While unplanned imperfections are guaranteed to drive you up the wall, most of your guests probs won’t even notice. So instead of sweating the small stuff, take a deep breath, shrug it off and enjoy the night what for what it is: a beautiful expression of your love giant photo op with Everyone You Know. Plus, cake!
(P.S. We’re proud of how far you’ve come, kid…)
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