‘Jersey Shore’: The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same

You’d have to be blindfolded with pickles in your ears not to see that things are a bit different down at the Jersey Shore this season. Sober Situation has switched from causing house havoc to doing good deeds; one meatball’s got a bun in the oven, another meatball’s got a boyfriend; and our dear Vinny has gone celibate, choosing to smush Old MacDonald’s stuffed ilk in favor of Seaside’s hottest(?) guidettes.

But like the old proverb goes, “The more things change, the more they stay the same.” Despite the positive transformations we’re seeing in the cast members, during episodes 1 and 2 we caught several glimpses of the old “Shore” we first fell in love with back in Season 1. For instance:

The obvious. The housemates (minus Snooki) GTL’ed like champs, pumped fists, dodged drama at Karma and bonded over Sunday dinner. Just like old times! Mostly.

Mike‘s abs are still seeking attention. We def caught Sitch giving the ladies a glimpse of his ripped, chiseled tum tum at the club. Naturally, they’re the same washboard abs you could do your laundry on (after lifting and tanning, of course).

The girls are still expanding their vocabulary. With JWOWW‘s help, Deena got schooled at the bar by learning a new word! “I think integrity means, like, shame. Like, I got a lot of shame. Like, I have a lot of integrity.” Almost, Deena. Almost.

SamRon are still in love/hate. They’re not tossing beds or torching personal belongings (yet), but Sammi and Ronnie are back to slinging empty threats and bleeped-out insults on the reg. Only they finally get to do it in their own room.

The sneakers come first. If Pauly D‘s not polishing his kicks with a bottle of 409, Vinny’s cleaning his Converse with mystery spray. But unlike Pauly (favorite PD quote ever: “I’m over here trying to clean my sneakers. I can’t concentrate! All this fighting! They’re talking about relationships, my sneakers are dirty!”), Vinny was able to multitask sprucing up his Chucks and doling out love advice to a distraught Deena.

+ Did we miss anything? Tell us what else you think has changed, and hasn’t, about the ol’ Seaside crew.

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