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Dear The Situation:

We here at Remote Control are always game to see how one of your random hook-ups comes about -- by definition, TV bloggers are voyeurs who take pleasure in witnessing the lowdown, trashy escapades of others. But we were a little disappointed by the MVP team's Extract the Grenade strategy on last night's episode of "Jersey Shore."

Don't get us wrong -- we've got no problem with the fact that you didn't offer those what's-their-names a tour of the house, or a glass of water, before directing them straight to your twin beds. We didn't even blink when you promptly kicked them out at sunrise with a "Great meeting you" and weak hug. Those chicks knew exactly what they were getting themselves into when they agreed to come to the house -- it's no secret y'all keep a Smush Scoreboard that details all your conquests. What really got our goat is twofold: That girl you tucked into bed because she wasn't up to your physical standards? 1) She was cute! And 2) Forgive us, but wasn't she the one who wanted to hit the hay, and hardly seemed interested in your goodies? Didn't she reject you first?

The impression we got after watching your plan play out is that any girl who's not all up in your junk gets called a grenade, and we think that's pretty lame.

Mike (and please feel free to pass along the message to your accomplices, Pauly D and Vinny): As usual, we got a kick outta all the theatrics, and we're looking forward to seeing more next week. We're just hoping you stop labeling self-respecting women who CHOOSE to sleep alone as hippos.

Sincerely,

RC

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Kristin Cavallari's really been playing around with her look this month. Not only did she color her hair a darker hue, but the always trendy ex-Hillzie stepped out on Wednesday donning a Farrah Fawcett-inspired feathered hairstyle. K-Cav paired her '70s blowout with a mixture of surplus and designer fashions, rocking teeny weeny white shorts by Black Orchid, an oversized Splendid blouse and nude Hussein Chalayan cut-out heels.

+ What do you think of K-Cav's throwback style? Are you feeling the 'do, or do you prefer her hair stick straight? Sound off in the comments!

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Lately, it's been looking as if all the Angelina mishigas has died down and the roommates have come to accept her as part of the family. The only outstanding issue? Angelina isn't cleaning up after herself -- and apparently, it's a much larger problem for her roommates than they let on during tonight's "Jersey Shore." (The Situation can't seem to hold a grudge when there's pasta on the dinner menu.)

According to Mike, Pauly D, JWOWW and Snooki in our latest episode of the Jersey Shore Hook-up, the whole house kept Angelina at arm's length throughout their stay in Miami -- not because she was still talking trash about them, but because Angelina's hygiene became a big stinkin' elephant in the bedroom. Watch the video to hear the cast members joke unapologetically about the flies that followed their frenemy around the house. (Please remind us to bathe in perfume the next time we interview these guys, they're brutal!)

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Well, we all called it. Judging by the scenes from next week that aired after tonight's episode, Sammi's denial has gotten so out of hand that even a typed note detailing her boyfriend's cheating might not tear her away from his loving hulking arms. In fact, it looks as if it only causes her to cut off her best friends.

JWOWW and Snooki recently told Jersey Shore Hook-up host Kenny Santucci that they're simply over the breakup/makeup drama--Sammi can elope with Ron in Atlantic City while she's drunk on SoCo for all they care. So why did they decide to deliver the anonymous letter in the first place (after all, they kinda knew it would cause the Miami house to implode)? Well, according to JWOWW, she couldn't deal with the guilt any longer. Plus, she and Snooki wanted Sam to find out the truth before the weekend hit, because apparently that's Ron's favorite time to get it in with other girls. (Guess he's a numbers guy, like his boy Mike.)

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Earlier this summer, Ronnie not only told us that the "Jersey Shore" house had a Smush Room, but that the territory was so damn filthy it was basically a biohazard. It's hard to imagine that any of the guys had success wooing a Miami girl into their filth trap of soiled sheets and last night's smeared bronzer, but who are we kidding? They're pros at the art of, er, romance.

On tonight's episode of "Jersey Shore," we watched The Situation outperform himself during a tricky game of 4 on 3. After a 30-second time-out (in which he placed two girls in Ronnie's room) and a successful Team MVP huddle, he drew up a game plan that guaranteed them all a victory (writing this is seriously making us lose interest in sports by the millisecond).

Check out this Jersey Shore Hook-up clip, where Mike explains how the Smash Squad (yup, that's what he's calling his team) earned their points (and who got the most), and why sleeping with a grenade gets you a big fat zero.

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There's nothing more frustrating than watching a mismatched couple fight and make up and then start fighting again (Ronnie and Sam: Aren't you tired yet?). While we were devastated to see that Snooki's breakup with Emilio caused her to cry a river in the middle of the street, we were pumped when she got all badass and burned up the memories like Angela Bassett in "Waiting To Exhale." The "Jersey Shore" castie hasn't done one friggin' club cartwheel all season, so we're ready to see Snooks crank up the pouf, hike up her leopard skirt and have another memorable hookup-with-a-rando moment.

Check out a clip from this week's Jersey Shore Hook-Up, where host Kenny Santucci wants to know if Snooki's seriously ready to start partying again. According to her, the answer is yes! Hallelujah!

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If we put you on the pop cultcha spot and asked you to tell us everything you know about Snooki, what would come to mind first? Perhaps her penchant for poufing, or her addiction to crunching on pickles straight outta the jar? Well, following the pint sized princess' every move for a season and a half might not show people the whole Snooks, so to help round out your knowledge of the "Jersey Shore" castie, we scoured UsMagazine's "25 Things You Don't Know About Me!" article to highlight some of her lesser known quirks. Here are our favorites, described by the Shorer herself:

1. "I collect rocks and have a big collection in my closet."

2. "I can't eat soup without lots of grated cheese in it."

3. "I'm obsessed with movies that deal with the supernatural and humans as aliens. Yeah, I'm weird."

4. "I'm actually very shy." (Ha! Sorry Snooks, we're just not buying this one.)

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We all know that before Kendra Wilkinson moved in with Hugh Hefner and became one of his girlfriends, she was a super athletic kid who loved sports, namely soccer. Perhaps the reason she loved kicking the ball around so much was because she was seriously crushing on her high school coach. "We would have to run and I'd purposefully be the last because he would be there behind me," Wilkinson shares in an upcoming episode of "When I Was 17."

Check out this sneak peek from Saturday's show, where Kendra's friend confirms that she even stuck out her chest to catch the stud's attention -- plus tune in at 11/10c to find out why Asher Roth thought he was a threat to suburbia and how Kelly Osbourne feels about having dropped out of high school.

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On last season of "Fantasy Factory," Big Cat proved there was a method to his madness empty gazes by successfully outstarring the Berra boys. He might love peering at his highly coveted I-make-people-uneasy plaque, but Rob Dyrdek wants to help him break out of his shell, because, well, he's kinda freaking everybody out. Check out this sneak peek of Monday's all-new episode, where Rob hosts an intervention for his socially awkward buddy. Who decides to confront him first? Chanel. The poor guy looks so uncomfortable sitting there!

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Watching Angelina awkwardly flirt with Pauly D a few weeks ago was really uncomfortable, especially when she took a cue from The King of Contradiction, Ronnie, and did that whole I-wanna-marry-you-slash-slap-you performance piece in the kitchen. Love Smushing will make you do crazy things ... and it looks like she might not be the only one in her family that has a thing for the Rhode Island DJ.

Check out this Jersey Shore Daily, where Pauly intercepts a phone call from Angelina's mom, who, after realizing that she's speaking with the studly gorilla, invites him over with promises of gooey macaroni. Oddly, he's never even been to Staten Island before!

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