Weren't watching MTV.com's live stream of "The Hills" finale? It's cool, we glued our eyes to the computer screen and did some due diligence so we could streamline all the chatter for ya. Below are CliffsNotes of all the juicy stuff:
+ Audrina Patridge has got a new man, and it's not Justin Bobby or Ryan "Spiky" Cabrera! According to the original Hillzie, she's back with pro BMX rider Corey Bohan. "He's always been my one true love," she told MTV News' Tim Kash. Watch the video here.
+ Brody Jenner may be bummed his time on "The Hills" is over, but the one thing he's really looking forward to? Privacy! Dude's lips = sealed (and tattoos = shrouded in plaid, of course) when asked by Tim about his relationship with Avril Lavigne.
+ Stephanie Pratt is still dating motorcycle man Josh! We're so happy to hear that she's finally found a good guy who appreciates her awesomeness.
+ Lastly, Perez Hilton announced that after all the blog posts he's written about the cast, he's never actually seen the show. (Um, even my dad has watched at least one episode of "The Hills." Not buyin' it, Perezzy.)