My little brother, Joey, died when he was 10 years old due to being neglected by someone who was supposed to be watching him. He was special needs but he touched everyone’s life that met him. He was such an incredible little boy.

It’s such a tragedy to lose someone so close, especially when they are only a child. My little brother’s death shook my family like nothing else we had ever encountered. But we stuck together and stayed strong and my family started an amazing organization that helps families with special needs children get what we call a “healthy break.”

Watching my parents raise a child with special needs showed me how much work it is and how very important it is that a family isn’t consumed with so many hectic challenges. With the Joey’s Gift organization, we get all the special needs children from the area together to play games, do crafts, watch puppet shows and just have a good time while their parents take a break. We do this with the support of Easter Seals and volunteers from the area. So hopefully someday we can help families all over the United States take that “healthy break.”

Find out more about Joey’s Gift here.

About Ben and I

Ben and I met in an odd way. When I was a sophomore in high school, I went to the mall with my mom and sister during winter break. My sister needed new tennis shoes so we went into a shoe store. There was a boy working there who made it completely obvious that he was flirting with me. I wanted to give him my phone number but, since I was only 15 years old at the time, my mother wouldn’t let me — lol. When we were leaving the mall, two of my friends were walking in. I pulled them aside and told them there was a cute boy working in the shoe store and asked them to go give him my number for me. Yes, I defied my mother; she was not happy with me.

The cute boy called me that night from his cousin’s house. We talked for about two weeks on the phone and online, and then I found out from his buddy info on instant messenger that he had a GIRLFRIEND. Yes, a girlfriend! I could not believe it. I immediately stopped talking to him. But about a week later I saw he signed online and decided to say hello and see if we could be friends. It turned out to be his cousin, Ben. We hit it off right away and were together about a week later! So, was it fate? If I had listened to my mother would I have ever met the man I fell in love with and married — lol? We’ll never know, I guess, but it was definitely worth it =)

When it comes to marriage tips, I think I could write a book. I may lose my cool sometimes — everyone does at some point or another — but I’ve learned to stay calm during an argument because it makes things much easier. Freaking out and yelling and cutting the other person down just makes things worse. Having self-control is the key to a lasting marriage. It’s obvious. You need to fight smart. Sit down, have a talk, be an adult ? you’re married! It makes things much nicer at home when everyone is happy and not upset about something someone said out of anger. Though it is hard sometimes to stay calm if you’re mad, it’s worth it in the end. Everyone slips and makes mistakes, but the sooner you make up, the better. Never let a fight drag on! Just fix it!!